While Listening to your Late Night Radio

If you ever get to read this:

I know you are not looking for me anymore. I saw it yesterday when I went to drop off what your muse had made me create.

I really like you and I always will. Note the word "like", as I said before, I will say it again; I won't jump until you catch me first or you are ready to catch me. You thought I was gonna say it first. And maybe that's why you pushed away.

I know you gave much. And I know you don't want to be alone. I also noticed you don't like to be exposed. I know also that you are not wanting anything serious because you think you won't meet the standards. News flash, my fair Viking: You did for me.

Like you all I wanted was company. IF you wanted something physical so be it. But I felt we connected from day 1. You did not needed to add or take anything from yourself. You were perfect just the way you are. But I think you didn't feel that and you didn't feel like that towards me.

I will have a lot to remisnisce from our time together. It wasn't much but you made me look beyond.

I am writing,
I am singing,
I am drawing,
I am living.

And all thanks to you.


I wish that you find what you are looking for. I thought I did.

Indecision

I am looking at your picture downloaded ( stolen ) from My Space. Is the same picture that I met you through Facebook. And I can't stop staring at you!

I was in the process of reviewing and deleting text ( saving the naughtiest/important ones to show and brag ) and I see a lot of indecision. I see lust (well, duh!). I see fear. It's like you throw the switch and then you pull it back. Those same idle hands that were caressing my face and my body and making me shiver and shake are the same hands that are telling me to take it slow. And I want to take it slow. But your hands, your lips and your body tell me something completely different. I don't wanna fall if you won't be there to catch me. I have fallen flat on my face way too many times.

I thank The Gods to sending me you in a moment of my life that I felt worthless. I praised Alleluya when I saw you for the first time. Big. Eternal. And so hot and so into me. Then, the slaughterhouse and now distance . . . I feel like a total fool.

The Viking

So one day I am looking at My Facebook, minding my own business; I think I sign in for a Speed Date thing. Many guys sent me winks and stuff. But all of them were in other states ( what's up with CA, people! ) . So the first one from the area who approached me is this percussionist.

He looked good in the picture. So I emailed him back. And we have been e-mailing/ texting for about two weeks now. The day of our first date, he felt himself coming down with something. He texted me and I had to take care of some business with my older son ( the son of the psychic ). So after the car overheating many times and almost red lining 3 times, I dropped my son over at his house and went to see the Viking at his lair.

Well, The Viking is a very imponent man. Really Big Guy. Husky. You can see he is strong. Already combing gray hairs. But makes him look distinguished.

We sat on his couch and we had the longest make out session I had in ages. I don't think I had something like that since, huh, college ( YES, VERY LATE BLOOMER) . I felt his beard rubbing against my face and it felt so good. It actually took me back to my first kiss. Alone. In the backseat of a car with a guy who I liked.

His hands caressed my face, my lips, the back of my neck, my back, my lower back. I felt lost when his collosal arms surrounded me. His big lips and even enormous tongue where licking from my neck up to catch any sweat drops so we can taste it together. This strong man will not let me go for nothing. I don't know if my arms would be able to reach around his ginormous back.

He got on her knees in front of me and the couch and started kissing my neck, to my neck bone and was trying to reach south when I had to stop him. And he told me "but I am being good!" with this child like mischevious voice. I thought at any moment he was gonna have my legs wrapped around him and he was gonna drag me to this gigantic bed and that was gonna be the end of an era. I felt like Jell-o in his arms. He noticed my hand shaking when I took a sip of water.

I left half an hour afterwards and I was still shaking, having the smell of the aftershave all over my face and my hands and feeling his beard scratching my face and my neck.

We have been in contact for the most of the days. And yesterday morning, I had the pleasure of ending the era. We spooned each other and that's when everything started. I have not had action in quite sometime, so I was tighter than usual. I cannot remember how many times I climaxed, but doing it on a bed that big was fun. I remember laying down vertically on that bed ( that's how big it is )next to him, stroking his hair.

We went to watch TV for a bit and when it stroked 10am, I went to change clothes. He saw me from plain Jane to Mean Ginger in a matter of 10 minutes. He was like you did a Clark Kent/Superman.

15 minutes before my departure, he attacked me again. I drug him to his to his collosal bed but I looked at the time. So we couldn't finish. I sent him a message letting him know that our scent is entwined between my fingers.

He mentioned something about "it could be like this every morning" ( HUMMMM ) I took it as a mission every morning after putting the Yahoo's on the bus.

This could be the beggining or the end.